Hardy Plumbing
January 26, 2011

Jerry's Ink

I'm Not Responsible For Anything I Write This Week

I'm just so damn mad.

I'M MAD about global warming because I'm freezing. I'm mad at Al Gore for pushing his money-making global warming agenda so that when it's as cold as it is right now, it's because of global warming.

And next summer, if the thermometer goes over 90 degrees, it's because of global warming.

If it rains a lot, it's because of global warming.

If it doesn't rain for a while, it's because of global warming.

I'm pissed off at the global warming mafia, who bully anyone who questions global warming. Well, I'm mad and I question it and if you have a brain you'll question it, too.

I'M MAD because Keith Olbermann went and got himself pushed out of MSNBC.

And there went my lifelong dream of being named Worst Person in the World by him.

I'M MAD at the Jets for having one of the best teams in football with a great young quarterback, Mark Sanchez, and they still allowed one lousy offensive coordinator, Brian Schottenheimer, to make the decisions that destroyed their chances to get into the Super Bowl.

When questioned why he wasn't in the game against the Steelers from the very beginning, Santonio Holmes, the Jets' great wide receiver, angrily answered, "Ask Coach Schottenheimer."

I'M MAD because the Giants have a coach, Tom Coughlin, who is so bad they will never again make it into the playoffs as long as he is their coach.

I'M MAD in advance for all the nasty letters I'm going to get for reprinting the letter below, written by Ken Huber of Tawas City, Michigan, and passed along to me by The Independent's good friend Andrew Benjamin.

Let me say I do not agree with all of the issues Huber writes about, but I'm in complete agreement that there is a double standard about how these issues are treated by the politically correct liberal left.

Let me repeat that again for the very dense. I do not agree with everything in Mr. Huber's letter. So why am I reprinting it? Because I believe we do have a double standard and I love the line in the letter about Congress:

"Has America become the land of the special interest and home of the double standard?

"Let's see: If we lie to the Congress it's a felony and if the Congress lies to us it's just politics. If we dislike a black person we're racist and if a black person dislikes whites it's his First Amendment right. The government spends millions to rehabilitate criminals and does almost nothing for the victims. In public schools you can teach that homosexuality is OK but you'd better not use the word "God" in the process. You can kill an unborn child, but it's wrong to execute a mass murderer.

"We don't burn books in America — we now rewrite them. We got rid of the communist and socialist threat by renaming its adherents "progressives." We are unable to close our border with Mexico, but have no problem protecting the 38th parallel in Korea. If you protest against President Obama's policies you're a terrorist, but if you burned an American flag or George Bush in effigy it was your First Amendment right.

"You can have pornography on TV or the Internet, but you'd better not put a Nativity scene in a public park during Christmas. We have eliminated all criminals in America — they are now called sick people. We can use a human fetus for medical research, but it's wrong to use an animal.

"We take money from those who work hard for it and give it to those who don't want to work. We all support the Constitution, but only when it supports our political ideology. We still have freedom of speech, but only if we are being politically correct. Parenting has been replaced with Ritalin and video games. The land of opportunity is now the land of handouts. The similarity between Hurricane Katrina and the gulf oil spill is that neither president did anything to help.

"And how do we handle a major crisis today? The government appoints a committee to determine who's at fault, then threatens them, passes a law, raises our taxes, and tells us the problem is solved so incumbents can get back to their reelection campaigns.

"What has happened to the land of the free and the home of the brave?"

If you wish to comment on "Jerry's Ink" please send your message to jerry@dfjp.com or visit indyeastend.com and scroll to the bottom of the column.

  1. print email
    Jerry, Jerry, Jerry
    January 26, 2011 | 02:58 PM

    We gettin' old, Jer. But I'm mad as hell, too. And love to see you vent.

    Sean Fitzpatrick
  2. print email
    I love to hear
    January 28, 2011 | 02:25 PM

    I love to hear your thoughts on the problems - any thoughts on how to fix it?

    Gabriella Warmenhoven Matus
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