Hardy Plumbing
December 13, 2006
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Jerry's Ink


Is It A Joint? Or Is It Part Of A Jewish Plot Against Crazy Mel?



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(click for larger version)
It can't be seen by the naked eye. But go on the Apple website and check out the movie teaser trailer for Apocalypto, Mel Gibson's new gory and disturbing movie:

http://www.apple.com/trailers/touchstone/apocalypto/hd/

At first it looks like an ordinary piece of hype, tripe, movie trailer. But no, kiddies, because hidden on the tape, with all its scary music and pounding drum sounds and quick blurry cuts, is a single frame — invisible to the eye no matter how many times you play it. But if you pause the tape and go frame by frame . . .

At 1 minute, 46 seconds into the trailer you see the photo that is being exclusively shown here at The Independent. I'm not talking about East End exclusive; I'm talking about world exclusive. Eat your heart out People magazine — you can't publish this picture without asking permission from The Independent. Same goes for all the other newspapers in the world.

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So let's look at the picture — is that a joint in Mel's mouth or a cigarette? Look at Mel's shiny eyes. Look at the silly expression on his face. Can you imagine him thinking, "I don't care if the Mars candy family might have changed their name from Marcowitz and may be orthodox Jews, they make Snickers candy and I have this desire to eat a dozen Snickers. I MUST HAVE SNICKERS OR I WILL DIE . . . THEN I WANT POTATO CHIPS AND YANKEE DOODLES AND M&Ms"?

Some (his publicist) will say it's a cigarette. I vote it's a joint.

So who put it there? Clearly an enemy of Mel who wants to hurt him. But that leads me to my number one suspect, Mel himself. What better way to get even with yourself for being such a schmuck than to sabotage your own movie trailer with a picture of yourself with a joint in your mouth? Take it from me, Mel, you look better with a joint in your mouth than your usual foot in your mouth.

MY FAVORITE CHRISTMAS MESSAGE . . .

Of the year was sent in by Peter and Diane Bach from a greeting they forwarded to me from Mr. Bill Eulberg.

All I can add is AMEN.

FOR MY DEMOCRATIC FRIENDS:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

We also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. And, without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishes.

By accepting these greetings, you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher.

This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

FOR MY REPUBLICAN FRIENDS:

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

If you wish to comment on "Jerry's Ink," send your message to jerry@dfjp.com.

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