November 22, 2006
Kiss & Tell
The Gods of Dating
While dating is not exactly something we would term a spiritual pursuit, it brings up the question of whether you believe in a higher power which is guiding your life. And if you do believe in this love god or goddess, is he or she benevolent or as Shakespeare posited, "As flies to wanton boys, are we to the gods; they kill us for their sport." As I look back on some of my romantic escapades I can only conclude that the love gods have toyed with my heart for their sheer amusement.
I just spent a weekend in New York City with two of my single girlfriends from Los Angeles. The topic of discussion was how to meet men who could be serious prospects for a committed relationship. Do you just go about your life with passion and interest, figuring fate will present Mr. Right at the appropriate moment, or do you treat finding a man with the same calculation and intensity as an executive job search?
One of my friends conducted an extensive online dating outreach which led her to a guy who looked good on paper, or in this case html, but in person revealed some very troubling attitudes, such as anyone who isn't a Republican is an idiot. Still she gave it the old bi-partisan try and after going back and forth to each other's cities and even meeting each other's families he declared her a perfect gal and dumped her. The other had followed a man to New York for the weekend, even willing to relocate only to discover that his ultra conservative exterior hid a very dark and scary definition of a good time. She moved into our room.
So what were these women to do? Their pro-active searches, willingness to go to the ends of the country to find love, and ability to overlook minor to major flaws got them nowhere except a one-way ticket to disillusionment and left them wondering if they'd have been better off just sitting home. Well, a New York City hotel room is no place for a couple of hot babes to sit home on a Saturday night so I tipped the concierge handsomely and had him set us up at the hippest night spots downtown.
We breezed into the ultra-chic bar at the 60 Thompson Hotel and found a comfy seat in the lounge from which to people-watch. This seemed fine until a supermodel had to plunk down next to us in her plunging neckline with breasts that defied gravity. She ignored our silent shun, "Don't you dare even think of sitting next to us making us look like Whistler's Mother next to your Botticelli." Ah, remember those pesky gods with their warped sense of sport.
Quite frankly the three of us had discussed the election and its ramifications, the best time to exercise stock options and cellulite gel.
But the reason we were here was to check out the men.
One of my friends had eyed an attractive man across the way so our other friend left for a few moments and returned with him in tow. I was impressed. While he seemed nice enough to me their joint opinion of a man in his late forties who had never been married and went everywhere with his dog was not good.
They decided to call it a bust and go home. Well the gods on Mt. Olympus or of United Airlines were relentless and one of the gals, due to a glitch at security ended up missing her plane and was pretty much reduced to tears. However, as she took her seat on the next flight an incredibly gorgeous man accompanied by a flight attendant apologizing about first class being full was ushered back to sit in the seat next to her.
Turns out he's a fantastic, successful motivational speaker who travels the country and found her, over the next six hours, to be an intoxicating and exciting creature. So what's the last word from the dating gods? Faith baby, faith.
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