Hardy Plumbing
August 30, 2006

Hamptons Daze


The End

Summer is coming to an end. We don't like this. We propose that we keep summer going until snow hits the ground. Why is it that the Hamptons turn into a ghost town after Labor Day? It's still nice out for the next month or so. Why do people just stop coming here? Normally the break is welcomed, but not this summer. It has been the greatest summer ever and we're not ready for it to be over yet. Summer should start in early April and end in late October. Just so everyone knows we plan on keeping it going long after Labor Day.

It's always sad when the countdowns start. Only two more Boardy Barns left. Only four more chances to go to Beach Bar. This is the last week of Polo. The Hampton Classic is starting. The Pow-wow is soon. These are all awful signs that the summer is coming to an end. Before we know it, it will be dark at 4 p.m. and sweaters will have to be worn at the beach. These thoughts are so depressing we could just cry.

On Saturday night, Veronica did the unthinkable and volunteered to be designated driver. This will never happen again. Normally we would all just take a cab, but this night we had plans to go to La Superica in Sag Harbor and Cain in Southampton after that. A cab would have been ridiculously expensive and probably cost us girls almost as much as it cost to park at Cain! At least we worked our press passes, cut the line, and got in free. Gotta love it. I bet you wish you were press. We danced the night away and danced our way into some peoples' private table and drank their alcohol.

It was great until it was time to leave. When you're sober and trying to get four drunken girls to come back into your car at the same time it's almost impossible. When Veronica finally got everyone in her car there was someone who wanted to go back, someone hanging out the window yelling at nothing, and someone who wanted to go to different places. Basically the night ended in simultaneous puking and Veronica having to go to the car wash the following morning.

This week we attended The Beach Boys concert in East Hampton. It was a great show. We were right at the front of the stage. The singer winked at Veronica while singing "I get around." Hey, what's he implying?!? People got rowdy after a while. It must have been the free Publick House beer. Publick House cups were all over the place at the end of the night and Jameson commented on how the place looked like our front yard. It was a great event.

Sometimes when we're out on the town we become kleptomaniacs. We don't mean for this to happen, but it does. Successfully, this week we have stolen a very nice bowl, a few glasses, paper towels, coasters, a piece of a broken mailbox, various young boys' virginities, and two bags of frozen clam strips. Unsuccessfully, we have not stolen, a huge roll of toilet paper, a Corona doormat, an umbrella from a table that would look GREAT in our backyard, some stools, a golf cart and a bicycle.

We would like to wish everyone a wonderful and safe Labor Day weekend. Come to our party at Star Room on Monday, we guarantee a good time! Keep the summer going with us. We dare you! We're not going anywhere.

Contact us at hamptonsdaze@yahoo.com or www.myspace.com/hamptondaze.

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