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August 28, 2013

A Day In The Life


Ran into Brad and Bif at polo the other day.

Brad tells me Muffin isn't her usual self, must be this dreadful heat. I dare say it's best to stay out of the sun or risk a frightful burn!

Went to the club for luncheon. Carter, Brock and Roland were already there when I arrived. Brock had a very wonderful puce cashmere sweater draped over his shoulders. "Love the look, old man," I told him. Once Fitz and Alistair arrived we settled on the poached lobster salad and shared a bit of bubbly.

We discussed the sad state of the world. It does seem such a tragedy that so many, so many of the little people are so dreadfully, well, little.

Kensington came over to the table and told us one of his housekeepers walks to work because she can't afford a motor vehicle. The poor savage. I mean, really, darlings, can't she simply take the golf cart to work?

Later I met Fraser, Rutherford and Kinsley by the pool. Fraser wanted to go over a business proposition – he's raising capital for this upstart company, a mortgage provider that will lend money to the poorer families – well let me restate that – families from the other side of the tracks. They deserve to have homes of their own, or at least trailers – well maybe tents, at least. Of course, they will have to pay an enormous amount of interest, but that's because they have no money, I'm afraid, none at all to speak of, so we are taking huge risk, and that is extremely bothersome to us. So of course we should be handsomely rewarded.

Later I played a round of golf with Pa-Pa and his good chums Burke and Ezra. We were having quite the day until one of the boys became a bit winded. I dare say those caddies are so unnerving. I do wish they would keep up with us – we like to play at a brisk pace!

We caught up with the ladies at the annual benefit at the museum for the walk-in clinic – they do such good work at the clinic, you know, and the doctors who do so much need a lounge they can unwind in after dealing with those, how do I say, the very elderly, people. They are you know, so very old, and I must say, some have incurable diseases and they insist on going on and on with their little lives. It's rather sad. I've told Dr. Tomkins, my doctor, many times – you and your team had better make sure that doesn't happen to me! Imagine not playing tennis!

Muffin, Felicity, and Constance were socializing with the other wives when we arrived. "What do they do all day?" Brad wondered aloud to the other fellows as we approached the women. In this day and age, frankly, when so may wives lend a hand by helping the nannies and maid staff, what exactly do our wives do other then go to those afternoon teas? Certainly it is not a productive day to wile away the hours without accomplishing anything!

Just then Cornelia approached us excitedly. "You'll never guess what happened today!"

"One of the butlers called in sick?"

"Even more ghastly," she said.

"There is someone playing golf at the club without proper attire?" I asked in disbelief.

"Even worse. The Bentley has a flat tire! And I was running late for my appointment. And I asked Maria for a ride and she doesn't own a car."

So there it was. The face of poverty, delivered right to our front door.

"Well, why didn't she give you a ride in her golf cart?" Brad asked, genuinely confused. In fact, there was a shared sense of bewilderment in the room that was palpable.

It was Fraser who suggested the obvious. Why not lend the poor woman enough money for an auto? It wouldn't have to be much, of course – I mean these people think running water is a luxury! She would have to make monthly payments, of course – well, better make them weekly. And the interest rate would have to be substantial – I mean, my god, we are not communists. Perhaps then Maria could take her mother to the clinic!

Just then the waiter approached. "Oh darling, you must try these marvelous little pastries though I don't know what it is the chef calls them!" Cornelia exclaimed. "They are frightfully good. And do have a cocktail!"

She giggled freely. She reminded me of her days at Smith – so vibrant, so young! Ah, we were so in love then! We didn't need Bentleys to be happy in college!

Of course, we each had a Mercedes. I mean my god, we're not savages.

Well, I have a 9 AM tee time with Finn, Chad, Broderick, and Spence. Cornelia, I'm sure, has some important social event for some very good cause to discuss over lunch with Meg, Taylor and Madison. It never ends. Work, work, work. One day I hope we can slow down and just enjoy life.

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